I am writing this as I lay in the hospital with Jackie laying in the bassinet next to me. She has been so calm the last two days, soaking up everything around her. I have been thinking a lot about becoming a mom.
Waiting for her arrival, I spent a lot of time thinking about what kind of mom I wanted to be. All of that went out the window the moment the doctor put her on my chest. All of the ideas I had, they don’t matter. She is all that matters now. Raising her to be the best person she can be. Being the example to her that Paris has been and continues to be for me. I want her to be kind, patient, understanding of others and loving. The best thing I can do for her is to show her how to be that kind of person.
Everything I do now will be seen by her. How I speak to others, how I treat others, how I live my life. I want her to always know she is loved. The last few days have shown me how much she is already loved from all of the messages, comments, texts and family support. I know she will never question that she is loved by her family and friends.
One of the things I have loved the most about the last few days is watching The Husband become a dad. He was with me for the entire labor and delivery and stood over Jackie as they cleaned her up and did the initial tests on her. Every moment he has had to be near her, he has taken. I didn’t know I could fall more in love with my husband but watching him become a dad has made me see him in a new light.
I know this is kind of a rambling post but I wanted to share these thoughts while they were fresh. Next week I will be sharing Jackie’s birth story! Thanks for reading and for your support during this huge transition.